What is your worst nightmare?

Forget about scary monsters and other standard nightmare fare.  The worst nightmare I ever had was one where I was buying an infant coffin.

Maybe that needs a bit of background.

I have an almost-two-year-old son, who has never been particularly healthy.  During the first couple months of his life, we spent more nights in the emergency ward than we did at home.

He had raspy lungs.  He had a heart murmur.  He woke up in the middle of the night screaming with pain and fever.

Then, the doctor tells us he has a low white blood cell count.  Further testing is required.  Can’t tell us what’s wrong.  Gives us a pamphlet for leukemia treatment options.

Our hearts stopped.

Three more weeks of testing, with this hanging over our heads.  Sleepless nights.  When we did sleep, we had nightmares of funerals, coffin shopping, hospitals.

Every time our son was held and a stranger approached, he screamed and pulled away, fearing another needle.

Finally, an answer.

Lactose intolerance produced several of the symptoms.  Excess mucous (caused by lactose buildup) caused the rasping lungs.  Heart murmur within standard tolerance for his age range.  Midnight pain and screaming caused by undigested lactose fermenting in his intestines.

The low white cell count and fever were the only ones not caused by lactose intolerance; these were caused by an infection with bad timing.

Relief was very much present in our household when we got that news.  We took him off milk, and results were visible within two nights.

Multiple small, unrelated symptoms led to one of the worst nightmares of my life, and an experience I hope never to repeat.